“Freedom is loyalty to one’s best self and principles, and this is often disloyalty to overall idols and fetishes.” Mark Twain
Based on my research, my experiences and my own reflections, I see human growth as a journey - a steep rise from dependence to independence to interdependence into transcendence. This lifetime journey begins at birth, if we are determined by our parents and other loved ones.
The process of becoming physically independent is automatic with age. We take up jobs, move from our parents’ houses, get married and have kids - measures toward taking responsibility for our own lives in addition to for family members who are now hooked on us. For all, our quest for liberty ends here.
But being human isn’t just about physical and material improvement. We will need to develop emotionally and intellectually. Emotionally, desenvolvimento humano of us stay dependent - letting situations around us control our emotions. If we are not masters of our emotions, how can we really be masters of our own destiny?
Emotional maturity or independence is not about trying to control what happens to people. Rather it’s about how we respond to what occurs to us. It is freedom of choice in the way we react to adverse conditions. We could lash out, as we may have done as children, or we could opt to be concluded and thoughtful and positive about going forward.
I ask participants to invoke the sense of ‘How Wonderful’ whenever they’re in a poor position. For instance, imagine you are late to an important meeting cause a flight has been postponed. Would you encounter it as a superb moment? Would you see that as wonderful?
Most participants look at me like I’m crazy. “That would be just like lying to myself,” the say. “Even though I say that a situation is not so bad, it is still a poor situation. It doesn’t go away.” As we workshop this idea further, they concede that they’re more inclined to come up with creative answers when they are in a good mood than when they’re angry and upset. They also see how a bothersome situation might really be an excellent chance to learn something new or generate some creative ideas. They walk out thinking, “Hmm, I wonder whether this could work. I will attempt it…”
Moving on to intellectual development, de Tocqueville commented on how Americans have so little independence of mind but so much freedom of conversation. It is a worldwide phenomenon.
Starting from our schooldays, we’re educated answers to questions that we don’t have. We are led to think that there is one correct answer and there’s some expert somewhere who has figured out it. As we grow into adults, we are brainwashed by the media, the promotion messages and the political propaganda; we live in the comfort of never having to exercise our intellect. From the Middle Ages, religion forced humanity to some set of beliefs. In the current times, we accept the supposed wisdom of scientists and pseudo-scientists - like economists - without much question.